yes i often ask myself this question over and over again too! *hi5 if you do the same!* but normally, the very very usual answer that came to your mind would be, come on, he’s just not here YET. but have you thought about whether or not will he EVENTUALLY comes? what if he doesnt? i havent thought about that until today. i have to admit, i am irresponsible and that might be just the reason why im still single. i have a fairly acceptable reasons behind this which is, i get distracted easily, for e.g i might be talking to you on msn when im watching my favorite (or any random) movies/dramas, when the drama gets too overly excited, i tend to just look at the tv and not taking a glance at my lappie(or i might just shut it down without checking)(oh btw, i do the same to my phone too!). secondly, im really forgetful. for e.g i might tell you, “hey baby, imma go bath now, ill get back to you later”, sometimes i DO get back to you later but “later” would be long termed or sometimes, just couldn’t be bothered. so now all of you know why your messages are not replied, or so i said, sent to the outer space?
many of my friends have came about to tell me that i dont reply messages or do not do what i should or maybe i just forget about things that ive promised. it is about time for me to really think about this problem(or behavior) that i should seriously change. maybe i am this irresponsible cause im not committed to anything else than my baby April. nothing in my life is worth much more than my family and April. (almost forgot about family. :P) and yeah, i am selfish. im selfish for myself. so? dont you dare tell me that you are not a tiny winy bit selfish for yourself! once you get dumped(or cheated) you’ll learn how to be selfish for YOURSELF! if you’ve never yet been dumped(or cheated), dear junior, you’re still have lotsa things to learn. i am NOT cursing anyone to get dumped or cheated, im just, simply stating the truth! i mean, truth does hurt! but who wont learn from getting hurt? e.g you climb trees, then you fall, will you climb trees anymore? NO!(if you said yes, slap yourself, cause i think ure being rather silly or you’re simply psycho cause you like getting hurt!)
okay, im sliding reallllyyyyy far from my topic here. *oops* back to the point. im still single cause my expectations are really too high which makes most guys being afraid to come for me. but hey, i just wanted something like taylor lautner, isit too hard? (JUST KIDDING!) i just want them to be sweet, caring, friendly and loves me for who i am. of course with looks that’s look-able if you get what i meant. not to ugly obviously. ill be seeing him everyday neh! second, this is really my problem, a major one indeed. i really hate commitments. not that i cant stop flirting around when im hooked or married. obviously ill jaga jaga when im not single right? *rolleyes* what i meant is, i just dislike guys who will kip messaging you messages like “honey, where are you? with who? girl/boy? what time come home?” and what i especially hate is when i dress up abit too low or what not, they will go, “honey, i forbid you to where clothes like this anymore!” i mean, i really dislike guys who control me or rather, change me? i like being who i am, i like dressing the way i want, i just dont like to be controlled. that’s also a reason why i always back out from guys that i like once i know they do share the same feelings. im just afraid of getting hurt, afraid of losing something i love dearly, afraid of being cheated like i once did! it’s just something i could nvr ever get over with! that’s just how deep the cut was! that damage have been done. i just need someone who can mend all my pain and could let me trust him fully without any hesitations. why isit just so hard to find someone like that? dear God, pls, grand my wish this coming christmas!
Ashley&Lautner 